October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month.  I, for one of too many, do not need to be reminded.  I lost my sister and best friend after her nine year battle.  There is at least one other person that I know that keeps this in my mind and heart always.

A Keen Awareness
by Michael Romani

Another turned page on the calendar
And suddenly it's become October
My heart aches at the immenseness
Of the need for breast cancer awareness

It's the scourge of our tragic modern age
And equally source of both pain and rage
All the things that I wish I had maybe said
The absence of you echoing in my head

The absence of you echoing in my heart
The tears that have flowed from its start
As I watched you fight on for nine years
You fought so bravely never giving into fears

Every moment, I remember words said in our last call
Calling to ask me to survive and stand firm and tall
You had fought until there was no further way to answer
Your pain was overcoming you and you had lost to cancer

You asked me if it would be alright if you let go
As though that was something in my ability and control
All I could say was that I wanted you out of pain
Every moment before and since has seemed insane

I remember falling to my knees to desperately bargain
Asking the Lord to take me not you - clinging to the margin
You had always been my best friend and my greatest hero
And me, despite the medals, my life means less than zero

With great bravado, I tried to offer some assurance
Telling you I'd see you on the other side as reassurance
But, let's face it cowgirl, the Lord needs angels in heaven
And me? I won't cut it with all of my constant misbehaving

You laughed and told me that I had always been your hero brother
I faked a smile swearing you had me confused for some other
Then whispered that I love you and I needed to let you go
So that you could do as you needed, hanging up as tears flowed

So hello October, with your pleas for breast cancer awareness
Let me just tell you that life with my sister is barrenness
And I won't lie that things are going to be just fine
Unless fineness has become something I can no longer define...

(c) October 1, 2018  Michael Romani
All Rights Reserved